Monday 17 September 2012

The Headlines

GCSES TO BE SCRAPPED, REPLACED BY BORIS JOHNSON
"Polls show that the public prefer him"

HILLSBOROUGH REPORT NOMINATED FOR MAN BOOKER PRIZE

GOVERNMENT GIVES GO-AHEAD TO FULL-SCALE ATHLETE CULL
"An unseasonably wet summer, coupled with an abundance of stadia and velodromes, has meant that the athlete population has swelled. The transport network is infested; it's now rare to find an open-top bus that doesn't contain a waving athlete."




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