Dear The Police,
We’re told that we should let you know if we think a crime’s happening, and that we should ‘report anything suspicious’. I felt the urge to write to you after watching a documentary about Lego.
You see Lego, the documentary informed me, is produced at a rate of sixteen thousand bricks per second. Over one year, the flagship factory in Denmark produces forty billion pieces. That's sixty for every person on Earth. Lego could be considered the world's most productive manufacturer, creating about three hundred million tiny rubber tires a year. Now I may not be a scientist, but I know that plastics are made from oil, of which there is a finite amount. I’m going to be blunt; I think someone is slowly trying to convert the world’s oil reserves into Lego.
Now, I can think of many reasons why someone might want to do such a thing (imagine a world in wehich there are no disputes over oil; or perhaps this is a vendetta by an evil genius whose parents refused to buy him duplo).
I just thought it should be brought to your attention.
A Concerned Citizen.