Back in my day...

Back in my day

Back in my day, people used Internet Explorer. If you had a question to which you required the answer, and none of your immediate friends or family knew, you would hire an intrepid adventurer. He would commission a magnificent boat, with billowing silken sails, hire a crew of twenty men, and set off down the intertubes. Occasionally, explorers would return with tales of new and uncharted lands. If they didn’t fall off the edge.

Back in my day, there was no telephone voting on TV shows. If you wanted to influence the outcome, you had to do it the old-fashioned way and blackmail the judge.

Back in my day, politicians didn’t refer to hard-working families, although children did still spend shifts down the mine.

Back in my day, there was no Skype. If you wanted to send a message to your friend, you’d have to go to a glazier and get it etched onto a pane of glass. Then, in the middle of the night, while your friend was sleeping, you’d let yourself into their house and install your pane of glass in the front of their monitor. It was an inconvenient system, I will admit, with messaging quite expensive and numerous mistaken arrests for breaking and entering, but it kept the glazing industry afloat in what must be said was an era of decline for the stained-glass window.